The Best and The Worst Kits at The Tour

There's only four days to go until the best 198 riders in the world set off for their 3 week schlep around France. We've talked about who will be riding and where they will be riding but we've yet to mention what they will be wearing. Cycling kits exist in a perfectly balanced vacuum, there has to be an equal amount of rubbish kits for the brilliant ones to exist and today we're calling out the bad ones and praising the stylish gems that our favourite riders will don for July.

Abbie Saunders is Bike Route Hub's resident fashionista. With her sharp tongue and sharp style she's perfectly happy tearing chunks out of the kit designers who have punished 25 poor riders by making them wear their hideous creations for a year. When she isn't doing this she also writes on figsandfootprints.blogspot.com which focuses on healthy living and exercise. Maybe finish that burger and pint whilst reading this blog.......

Five Worst

Trek Factory Racing ~ 3.5/10

Despite the futuristic appeal of the silver space-age gloves and ankle contour moon boots, Team Trek’s kit seems a little, well, effeminate. The slick body contour fit and bizarre reverse plunge neckline not only looks like a leotard design more suited to a performance gymnast, but also strikes me as an immediate sunstroke hazard. In the mid-Summer heat of Tour De France, I wouldn’t fancy myself with those tan lines…

Europcar ~ 3/10

If you’re Irish, green may well be your lucky colour. But otherwise motor folklore dictates that green is a veritable car crash. Type ‘green cars crashing’ into Google and you will be met with images of Andy Warhol’s famous painting ‘Green Car Crash’ and headlines such as ‘Green Party leader delivers “car crash” performance’. Would you trust anything green on the roads based on this correlation? Sorry Europcar…

Lotto NL-Jumbo ~ 2/10

If, like me, you find yourself asking what your own chances are of winning the lottery, you may also, like me, find yourself asking what the chances are of Team Lotto NL winning the Tour De France… Needless to say, the team’s official sponsor emblazoned across the front does not instil me with a huge amount of confidence.

Team AG2R-La Mondiale ~ 1.5/10

In essence, there is very little wrong with Team Ag2r’s kit. It is well streamlined, with good coverage and neat brand representation. However if you are inclined toward the immature, you may want to question the colour scheme. I can’t help but think that turquoise shorts may have been a little more fresh and eye-catching than these ‘I soiled myself on the Tour De France’ meggings.

Tinkoff-Saxo ~ 1/10

Poor Team Tinkoff… The very misguided decision to photoshop the team mates in against a black background does nothing for the fact that a black crotch patch already draws attention to the area. Add this to the fact that their team name is ‘Tinkoff' and you may begin to find yourself wondering if there’s a crotch there at all…

Five Best

Cannondale-Garmin ~ 7.5/10

The new Garmin kit is reminiscent of a Softmints branding colour scheme. Who doesn’t like a Softmint? The pattern also seems to be inviting its wearer for a languid game of golf rather than an invigorating incline cycle. Who knows? Maybe the Softmint serene Garmin team have coined a 

relaxing new cycling style too…

Orica-GreenEDGE ~ 8/10

In case you didn’t know, mesh is in. It appears that Team Orica have taken their new season look straight out of New York Fashion Week’s Spring / Summer 2015 catalogue. With on-trend fishnet look sleeves and uppers, who cares if the kit is practical? It’s fashion, dahling…

Etixx-Quick-Step ~ 8.5/10

Team Etixx have taken Team Trek’s kit and injected it with some alpha male. The black body, high neckline, long sleeves and even ‘quick step’ mantra stapled down the side give Team Etixx the edge. If their performance is anywhere near as ‘panther’ as their look, we can expect strength and agility from the team in this year’s Tour.

Astana ~ 9/10

Potentially one of the most polarising kits of the competition is Team Astana’s. As a fan of controversial colour schemes, I am instantly drawn to this head-to-toe turquoise ensemble. Team Astana won’t be missed by cyclists or onlookers in this hue, and its summer sky-inspired feel should keep Team Astana in high spirits. They may not look like the dark horses of the competition, but let’s face it, the future is bright.

Movistar ~ 10/10

Well, this guy just looks like a winner. That latex shine seems to give this kit a Marvel Comics Superhero appeal with the streamlined stripe detail on the sleeves emphasising those superhuman muscles. The Movistar branding also seems to play into the subliminal suggestion that it could be Brad Pitt or Orlando Bloom riding the bike. Superhero, movie star, and cyclist rolled into one. Who wouldn’t want them to win?!